awesome times
Don’t forget how bad we pwned the dinosaurs

Fuck yea mammals, the survivors of the synapsids!

And now a moment of silence for our departed Dimetrodon brothers. Gone but not forgotten.

lol I’m Steve Irwin

lol I’m Steve Irwin

I’m So Privileged

And so sick of being stricken with diarrhea every damned day of my life.

I knew this one would be too long for Twitter so I’ll take it to Tumblr - incidentally the den of a new breed of social justice warrior, the Fat Activist. This persecuted minority has the benefit of 21st century communications in their civil rights struggle and misses no opportunity to document and decry their constant discrimination faced at the hands of their thinner oppressors. In recognition of their noble struggle, I have been reflecting on the many intrinsic privileges life has bestowed upon me as a Person of Thinness - privilege I never even knew I had! And so follows a raw and honest look into the life of a thin-privileged shitlord.

Thin privilege is undergoing your first colonoscopy at the age of 22 and all the joy of the requisite bowel prep work; in this case entailing a long night naked in the bathtub with uncontrollable liquid shitting and vomiting. I hope to Gods that by the time I’m 50, or the usual age at which a preventative colonoscopy is recommended every 5 to 10 years or so, that medicine has developed a significantly less harsh bowel cleanse.

Thin privilege is submitting to being medically probed from both ends within the span of a few months in hope of an answer to my lifelong gastrointestinal woes. Crohn’s disease is 99% out despite a blood relative’s positive diagnosis, though I’m less convinced on the exclusion of celiac disease considering I had only resumed a gluten-rich diet a few weeks before the biopsy. True to the Greater Universe’s love of the ironically cruel, if one practices the cure before arriving at the definitive diagnosis, there may be no symptoms present for a biopsy to find. Despite the question of celiac disease feeling naggingly unanswered in my mind, pessimism reminds me that even when I faithfully followed a gluten free and lactose intolerance friendly diet, I still had days of running for the bathroom and my stomach groaning in pain.

Thin privilege is complete strangers’ entitlement to comment on my appearance: at restaurants, malls, airports, even a hospital of all places. Upon being loudly and publicly called out on my weight in the aforementioned location, I responded in what I hoped was a friendly enough manner that my figure was hardly worth the discomfort of the celiac disease I was there to test for. 

Thin privilege is being too small to give blood - while many blood draws in my long history with a blood disorder have made me fearless of the needle and uniquely empathetic to the need. 

Thin privilege is menstruating a full year after your younger sister and your malnourished teenage body never acquiring sufficient fat or nutrients to develop anything close to her lovely C cup breasts. 

Thin privilege is omnipresent hoarseness and sore throat and frequent cavities and decay of the back molars, not thanks to bulimia but to chronic laryngopharyngeal reflux - the less common relative to gastroesophageal reflux (GERD) only without the heartburn for the most part and without obesity as a contributing factor. (Thin privilege is the unfounded and unspoken assumption of bulimia and anorexia). Thin privilege is the taste of bile at the back of my throat as my stomach chooses to rejects its meals up the opposite direction as well. Thin privilege is its frequent rejection of even a gulp of water when I brush my teeth and subsequent churning so loud and uncomfortable that I can only silence it and sleep by lying on my stomach. Well, at least my thin privilege endowed boobs allow for that.

Thin privilege is everyday fatigue by virtue of chronic malnutrition and dehydration. Thin privilege is taking supplemental iron to prevent a relapse of anemia so severe my heart races at rest and I scarcely have the breath to walk 10 feet.

Many fat activists would insist that weight is a thing entirely out of one’s control, and to that postulation I can offer no challenge! I could try switching diets with a HAES fan, it’s just that my body would likely quite literally flush away up to three quarters of the calories. Blessed by genetics indeed! 

While I can’t understood the dichotomy between how happy and healthy the Fat Activist insists himself to be alongside the persecution complex and bemoaning of oppression, my wish is merely to share the reality of my “greener” grass. It’s a shame, with near every part of mine seemingly falling apart, I could really use a thin-inclusive Body Acceptance movement. 

HEY A BIGASS SNAKE

HEY A BIGASS SNAKE

Marianne?

Oh, hello! I’m sorry, how many months ago had you come across me here?

I, at least, thought the IRL Joltik photo was a noteworthy find…

I, at least, thought the IRL Joltik photo was a noteworthy find…

I have a fursona.

I have a fursona.

everyone on the internet look at this dog

everyone on the internet look at this dog

OOH SNAKE LOOK AT THE SNAKE

OOH SNAKE LOOK AT THE SNAKE

Some dumb person’s personal tumblr

That’ll be my thing: the animal photos other find freaky, I find to be fascinating. Tumblr’s getting increasingly popular; gotta establish a presence here.